I Need to Know
by JeiC
Summary: Please just tell me.


Disclaimer: Dun own Kingdom Hearts…I just write the silly stories that are in my head for my own amusement.  
Warnings: angst

**I Need to Know**

by JeiC

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I hear weight shift on the chair at my desk before, "Hey, Riku…"

Looking up from what I was reading, I mentally prepare myself to explain how to solve yet another math problem, "Yeah?"

Impossibly blue eyes look away from me for a moment as if he doesn't want to ask, but Sora's need for an answer gets the better of him, "Can you tell me about Roxas?"

Okay, I was expecting something regarding the Algebra homework he's supposed to be working on. Turning my attention back to my book, I answer him truthfully, "I'm probably the last person you want to ask. We weren't exactly friends."

"But he's a part of me right? You're my best friend, Riku, how could you two not be friends?" His innocence kills me sometimes.

Running a hand through my hair, I put a piece of paper to mark my place before putting the book aside. My hope of avoiding this conversation was obviously dead and buried. I can't even bring myself to look at the spiky-haired brunette, "Yes, Roxas is a part of you, but…maybe under different circumstances we could have been friends. Why are you asking about him all of a sudden?"

Watching Sora nibble on the end of his pencil, he debates something…this is where I wish I could read minds. I also have to resist the urge to get up and snatch the pencil out of his mouth – mechanical or not, he really needs to break that habit one of these days. "It's just…I've been having these weird dreams lately. I think they might be Roxas' memories."

When he turned away from me to go back to his homework that immediately raised a red flag with me. Sitting up on my bed, I swing my legs over the edge so I can face where my best friend is sitting at my desk with his back to me. "Then I'm guessing you already know the answer to why Roxas would probably sooner see me dead than be my friend."

Never before had I seen him whip around so fast, eyes wide, "No, I don't understand! I know what happened and I know why both of you did what you did, but I don't understand any of it! I…I see his memories, but I don't know who he was. I don't know anything about him…"

Feeling guilty about too many things, the only thing that comes out of my mouth as I hide behind my long bangs is, "I'm sorry."

A moment later firm hands grip my shoulders, forcing me to look up into desperate bright blue eyes…the same eyes as a certain spiky-haired blonde Nobody. "Riku, I don't want an apology – I just want to know. I need to know."

I can feel my eyes widen at his last words and I have to force myself to keep from hyperventilating. It was just like when Roxas spoke with Namine…

"What? What'd I say?"

Shaking my head I look away, "It's nothing. What do you want to know?"

I could tell my best friend was less than convinced, but he seemed to let it slide for the moment, "I don't know. I guess I just want to know everything about him. I mean, he is a part of me and all and it's sort of scary that I don't know a part of myself…but Riku, you're the only one left that really knows Roxas."

Tilting my head to look at the brunette's face, I question, "Why don't you ask him yourself?"

"Because!" Sora pushes me slightly, tightening his grip on my shoulders, "Because…I can't find him to ask him. I keep looking for him, but it's like he's not there. I want to meet him so much, but…does he hate me?"

Gently pulling the Keyblade Master's hands off my shoulders before he leaves bruises, I console him, "I don't think he could hate you. Right now, maybe he just doesn't have the strength to be able to talk to you. When you met Roxas that one time, it must have taken a lot of energy to do it. He's probably trying to show you who he is through his memories, which is the same way he learned about you."

The oddly soft spikes nodded, "It's only fair that since he didn't have you to tell him about me that I should learn about him on my own as well."

Watching him move back to my desk slowly, I respond, "If you want, I can tell you what I know, but like I said earlier, we weren't exactly on friendly terms."

Sora didn't bother turning around to ask his next question, "Do you think you could be friends with Roxas?"

My old cocky attitude got the better part of me for a brief moment, "Provided he wasn't going to try and kill me again…" Lowering my head in shame I continue, "Yeah, I think I would like to be friends with Roxas if I were given the chance again. I'm sorry things happened the way they did, but I can't change the past."

Looking up again, I'm greeted by one of Sora's brilliant and irresistible smiles. "I think he would like to be friends with you as well. Now…can you help me with my homework?"

Getting up, I roughly mess up my best friend's already messy hair, "So many questions today…didn't you pay attention in class?

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Fin  
August 2007  
by JeiC  
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Author's notes: Nothing special to say. This was written from the following prompt:

**For:** kingdom100 (LJ community)  
**Claim:** Riku  
**Prompt:** Questions (#24)

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